From Gina Rudan's Blog:

Are you a Feeder or a Vampire? (is hyper linked)

Throughout my journeys in life, I have come to realize that people generally fall into two categories when it comes to their approach toward others. Some of us are “feeders”—folks who are constantly in a giving state, giving away our energy, attention and support. The rest of us are vampires, most comfortable in a state of receiving, fueling ourselves with the generous attention, energy and efforts of others. Vampires aren’t innately evil or bad; usually, they simply know no other way. Whether you are a vampire or a feeder isn’t important; what does matter is that you have a clear understanding of your role within this context.

If you are a feeder, like me, you really have to be mindful to manage the feeding and to remember to keep a little for yourself. And if you are vampire you have to be mindful to diversify your feeder supply so that you don’t go hungry when your favorite feeder ends up on empty, which eventually will happen.

This analogy may seem outrageous but believe me if you start to think of the people in your life you will immediately recognize every one of them as either a feeder or a vampire.

What is also interesting to note is that feeders will always be attracted to vampires and vampires will always be attracted to feeders. It’s a natural but dangerous symbiosis. Both have a tendency to cross the line with the other, go too far, give or take too much. Out of self preservation, both would seem to have a responsibility to stay within safe limits with each other, but this is rarely the case.

If you find you are a feeder giving to one too many vampires who are sucking the life out of you, the following tips will help you arm yourself emotionally and mentally against this mind drain. And if you’re a vampire who relies on lots of feeders in order for you to be productive and fulfilled, these tips will help ensure you get what you need.

Tips for Feeders
· Create boundaries and exercise discipline with these boundaries. This will prevent you from over extending yourself beyond a healthy level.

· Communicate your expectations clearly, early, and often with the vampires in your life. You are allowed to let them feed but don’t allow them to have a three-course meal. Appetizers only. You can’t ask a vampire not to feed for it’s his nature. You can’t win against nature.


· The most important thing to remember is to feed yourself first. If you don’t fuel your passions and attend to your own well being first and foremost, there will be nothing there for you or your vampires. The more you feed others the more replenishing you require.

· Cherish your relationships with other feeders. They can be a source of strength and inspiration when you need it most.

Tips for Vampires
· Don’t depend on a single energy source. Spread your hunger across a variety of feeders who can meet your variety of needs.

· Honor your feeders. Acknowledge that they are a source of energy and fulfillment in your life and express your gratitude for their generosity.

· Draw a line of respect between yourself and the fellow vampires in your life. Vampires love other vampires but power struggles often surface. Be cognizant of the boundaries necessary in these relationships for they are just as important as they are with feeders.

This post is dedicated to all the beautiful feeders and provocative vampires in my life. I acknowledge, honor and respect members of both these tribes, for genius dwells on both sides.


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Thank you GinaDiva for sharing!